It’s not about being a martyr

As we approach 40 weeks of pregnancy, and baby’s rapidly approaching eviction date (please come out soon, naturally and nicely baby!!) I can’t help wondering what it’s going to be like.

I’ve said to my friends, midwife, consultants and anaesthetists time and time again that I want to feel it. The little I have on my birthing plan is not about walking in there and wanting an epidural straight away – although I don’t doubt for a second that my low pain threshold-self will rapidly change her mind and demand all the drugs. Others, including the common-known-“helpful”-stranger to us pregnant ladies, have told me not to be a martyr and accept all the drugs – ask for all the drugs! And to be fair, I’ve said myself that it took all the drugs to get the baby in, so I’ll happily take all the drugs to get the baby out!

But it isn’t about being a martyr. For me I’ve always wanted to experience pregnancy and labour – and I never thought I’d get the chance. Never for a second did I think anything would ever work to make me fall pregnant. And so now that it has, I want to feel and experience every last ounce of it. Of course I hope it will happen again – but there is no guarantee. But it most certainly isn’t something I’m saying light heartedly. I don’t want to be drug free to gloat about it – I don’t even expect I’ll manage to be drug free, but it is 100% not about being a martyr!!